Welcome to Bizarro World

By James Banakis

April 8th, 2026

The only superhero I’ve ever acknowledged is Superman. As a boy I was addicted to comic books. I’d read them for free in my grandfather’s restaurants which had a magazine and newspaper section, about 8 feet across, and 6 feet high, next to the register. The bottom shelf had all the local newspapers. On the upper shelves there were news magazines, my grandmother’s favorite movie magazines, sport magazines, on the top shelves, the largest selling weekly pictorial journals, Life, Look, Saturday Evening Post, and on two separate circular turning racks a treasure trove of comic books. Papou let me read them in a back booth of the store if I’d wash my hands, be careful not to crease, or break the spine, and not eat or drink anything while reading.  I would carefully then return them and choose another. It was my own personal exclusive lending library. I was very respectful of his rules as I understood how fortunate I was to hang out in a candy and ice cream-making family business with a constantly updating inventory of comic books and sports magazines.

As a nine-year-old, Superman appeared very real and plausible to me. All the other superheroes seemed silly, dark, forced, and made up. I viewed Superman’s backstory as real history, almost biblical.

Yes, it’s Superman … strange visitor from another planet, who came to Earth with powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal men! Superman … who can change the course of mighty rivers, bend steel in his bare hands, and who, disguised as Clark Kent, mild-mannered reporter for a great metropolitan newspaper, fights a never-ending battle for truth, justice, and the American way!

I’ve been hooked for life. Of all the ingenious storylines created by DC Comics, Superman vs. Bizarro World, really captured my imagination. In Bizarro World, everything was the mirrored image of everything on earth only the opposite. Superman did battle against these forces of evil.

There was a classic Seinfeld episode in which the George Costanza character turn his life around in a positive way by doing the exact opposite of what ever his instinct happens to be. Jerry Seinfelt and Larry David are also Superman fans.

Last weekend I was attending our weekly breakfast meeting with my buddies at Simon’s Restaurant in Villa Park. As I drove up, Roosevelt Road was crowded with aging, Marxist, pathetic Boomers performing at their No Kings Rally. All of them had pre-manufactured protest signs, some in silly costumes. I’ve noticed that the left has appropriated the Fword in almost everything they currently say or do. They’ve begun dropping the F-word in cable news interviews and in Congress. So, there was a lot of F***Trump as I rolled down my window and pulled into the parking lot. The Democratic ads in the recent primary election featured F*** Trump as the full magnitude of leftist policy.  It must poll well with the base.

As I entered the restaurant, Simon the owner was busy chasing protestors from parking in his lot. I could relate. All my buddies were amused at how lame the demonstration was.

Where am I going with this? On the way home, it occurred to me that Democratic policy since the advent of Obama has been Bizarro World.

Before the Anointed One, the left and right were close to being the same. Most everyone thought that illegal immigration, communism, Iran, and criminals were bad. The flag, the Bill of Rights, capitalism and cops were good. After Bizarro Obama, everything that comes from his bizarro fortress of solitude in Jackson Park, is the opposite of what we understand as truth, justice, and the American Way. Before Obama, no politician wanted to be on the wrong side of an 80/20 issue. Today the Democratics double down on all their wildly unpopular, bizarro ideas. Most ironic of course, the only American acting out as an unelected king for the past 10 years has been Obama.

Test my theory.  Do you believe in the American way, or are you from Bizarro World?

  1. What is the definition of a woman? If you’re from Bizarro World you won’t be able to come up with a definition. If you know what a woman is, you believe in the American way.  Besides the physiological definition, my favorite characterization is appropriating former Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart’s remark, “I know it when I see it!”

 

  1. Who is the victim of any crime? If you believe it’s the criminal, and like our bizarro mayor that incarcerating a criminal is racist, you’re from Bizarro World. If you side with the victims and their families of any crime you believe in American justice.

 

  1. If you believe proving you are a citizen before voting, and that citizenship is our sacred right, you believe in the American way. If you believe we should open our boarders to all unvetted aliens and not question whether they can vote, you’re from Bizarro World.

 

  1. If you believe that women in Islamic cultures have more freedom than American women, you’re from Bizarro World. If you believe in the American way, you drop to your knees and thank God for our Bill of Rights.

 

  1. If you believe you’re a victim and refuse to take personal responsibility for anything. If you worship the federal government as your religion, you’re from Bizarro World. If you believe that America is the last best hope on earth, and we’re all part of the solution to our problems, you believe the American way.

I could continue, but by now you get the drill. Before Obama there was a great center ground of independents who both sides used to appeal to for support. No longer. Currently, you’re either a follower of the American way or from Bizarro World. If you think you’re undecided, you may be brain dead.

Here’s my simple diagnostic screening test to help you find out if you’re from Bizarro World or not. From now on, whenever you listen to any Democratic member of Congress, any leftist pundit, or the Anointed One himself and you find yourself nodding in agreement, you’re from Bizarro World. On the other hand, if you throw your slipper at the TV in disgust, thinking the exact opposite your probably an uninfected American.

In Superman lore, the man of steel travels to Bizarro world and gets arrested because he is normal and good.  He uses his superpowers to drain the swamp and reshape their planet. The Bizarro population becomes satisfied, and they allow Superman and Earth to live in peace. (I’m not comparing Superman to the current president, but there are some similarities here.)

This is the reason as a kid I used to tie a bath towel around my neck and jump off the furniture. He made me believe that I could be good and strong like him. People love Superman because he is the symbol of hope, not the audacity of hope. He uses his immense power to protect rather than to rule.

Finally, here’s my anti-bizarro recipe for sanity and contentment.  When a lib preaches something, you know is insane and scream four letter words, always think and do the opposite. I practice this daily. It works!

If you think Superman is boring, you’re why the world sucks today. There. I said it and I’m not taking it back.

– Chris Wichtendahl

-30-

Jimmy Banakis is a life-long restaurateur.  He was an honorary batboy for the White Sox in 1964. He attended Oak Park River Forest High School, Nebraska Wesleyan University, and Chicago-Kent Law School.  He claims the kitchen is the room he’s most comfortable in anywhere in the world. He published an extremely limited-edition family cookbook. He’s a father and grandfather, and lives in Downers Grove Il.

Comments 32

  1. Excellent column ! Thanks Jimmy Banakis for helping John Kass subscribers understand the insanity that has engulfed Illinois like a vintage black-and-white Twilight Zone episode.

    Your John Kass column is especially near and dear to me, since I attended Willowbrook high school, next to Simon’s Restaurant in Villa Park. Back then my Dad and his friends would laugh if our elected officials had difficulty defining women.

    Those old-timers had a sure-fire solution to moronic problems. We would mow the lawn, we would rake all the dead grass, and then we’d weed the garden. Next we would clean the garage, paint the house, and clean the gutters. After that we’d go to our grandparents’ houses, and start all over.

    Hard work turned boys into young men, in an era when all of us guys wanted to be exactly like our fathers, grand-fathers and uncles.
    My father was a Teamster. He delivered frozen food to North Shore restaurants 6 days per week, all year long. I wanted to be a Teamster too, but I lucked out and wound up in the Carpenters Union, so I only had to work five days a week.

    When dimwits carry protest signs in the suburbs, it’s an indication they have too much spare time and not enough yardwork.
    The “No Kings” slackers should get a landscaping job , or work in a restaurant waiting tables. They’ll realize America was built by kings. Not fancy kings like they have in Europe. In the USA every man who pays his mortgage, paints his house and mows his lawn is a king. That’s why people move here from all over the globe.

    1. Yup, I went to Willowbrook too. Class of 1980. My dad taught there from 1959-68. Mom worked as a principal’s secy. It’s a shame what has become of Dupage County. I moved to Nevada and am running for state treasurer, JeffCarterNV.com. Check it out

  3. Masterful, Mr. Banakis, masterful!

    My parents and grandparents, as well as legions of aunts and uncles now crowding heaven, would recoil mightily at the sight of No Kings acolytes cosplaying resistance fighters and rebels. They actually maimed cattle of landlords, faced the assizes of Kerry and either escaped to America or were bound over to Australia and worse,

    Bizarro indeed.

  5. Outstanding column Jimmy. The cosplay and preprinted signs (btw is there a union “bug” on those signs? ) all point to MAWF clutching their paths and screeching. Give em a one way ticket to Teheran and see how they like living there. Unreal.

  6. Besides the obvious strange psychology of liberalism, there is also the strange demographic behind it as people at these rallies tend to be relatively affluent, white, educated and suburban. They tend to be quite nerdy as if this is Revenge of the Nerds. Another factor is they obviously have too much time on their hands as most people have work, family and household matters to attend to. In an era of “identity” politics, the strange thing about these folks is a complete lack of identity. Do you ever see Cajuns, American Indians, Homecoming Kings and Queens, football players…at these rallies? I am 62 and none of the Italian, Greek, Croatian or Serbian kids I grew up with would ever be caught dead at these rallies. They knew who they were. Me, a Persian, Turkish, Spanish and half European Jew, know who I am even though I am a mutt. These lost souls are seeking connection and an identity and they found it on the Left.

  8. HAH!!!! Growing up, I was a Superman comic book person, exclusively, as well. I thought it was just discriminaing taste. Guess we were onto something.

  9. A masterful analogy. They are broken people, first, and no single organization leverages mental illness like today’s Democrat party. They are the Count Dracula to every shattered Renfield.

  10. Great article! But I do have to note that the Seinfeld where George does the opposite (S5E22) is not the bizarro world episode. It’s actually Season 8 Episode 3, where Elaine makes 3 new friends who mirror Jerry, George and Kramer, but are kind and generous instead of selfish and sarcastic.

  11. Bravo! Using The Bizzaro World to explain where we are is masterful! Great column, and all replies are on point as well. I couldn’t be on this site without inquiring about John Kass – how is he doing, health-wise? We know attitude-wise and grit-wise he is doing well, but it’s hard not knowing where he is in recovery. He stays in my prayers.

  13. James, your column explains exactly the way I feel and is the perfect illustration of what is going on now.
    You nailed it, so pathetic to see the insanity of these TDS people.
    Where were the demonstrations when President Auto-Pen Cadaver and his sidekick Giggles the drunk clown were literally destroying everything we grew up believing?
    It started with Gore trying to steal the election and while losing his home state.
    Then with the Manchurian candidate who has no record of being in college, no one remembers him in any classes and his hate America first wife.
    I often think exactly what your column explained we are in Bizzaro world.
    Your best column to date although I must say I have enjoyed reading all of your guest columns.
    So sad we are living in a country so divided and different from the one we grew up in back in the 60’s and 70’s.

  14. The truth, logic, and reality of what James illustrates is crystal clear. We lucid American patriots all acknowledge it; but singly, we have no effective impact. The need is to have his painful presentation seen by the largest population possible. Thus, James, John, please find many more print forums to focus on the pernicious American culture we are witnessing being degraded.

  15. It is precisely the corrupt, morally and spiritually bankrupt Democrats which has given rise to the equally morally and spiritually bankrupt Trump. He’s done a terrible job and he’s still loved by millions. That’s how bad the Democrats are.

    He was conned into this Iran war just as Bush was. Clinton and Bush gave most of the country over to the oligarchs and Trump has given the rest to the Israel lobby.

    These two parties are trip cheeks of the same backside. I will concede however, no matter how bad Trump and his psychphants are, the dems are even worse

    1. More “both sides are the same” crap from little Bobby.

      Besides your total ignorance of why Trump was elected and what Trump is doing in Iran (hint, the Maduro snatch is related to it), you keep trying to make the two sides of every 80/20 issue equally bad. It’s not working. As Dan Bongino likes to say, Republicans may not be the solution to your problems, but Democrats are definitely the cause of them.

      1. You’re right., Mr. Lee Lygiros! The cause of the current Iranian Problem, was Hussein Obama that his own party would agree if any rational whites are left behind in that party!!
        -Nambi

      2. Lee, we’ve spent trillions in Iraq, twenty years, and how many dead and seriously injured, in order to replace to Taliban with the Taliban. I just heard Mark Levin (R) Israel, bang the drum for nuclear weapons to be used against Iran. He’s also stated that Reagan armed the opposition in Nicaragua, Afghanistan, Iraq, how has this worked out?

        Both of these. National parties have great disdain for the citizens of America. You’re personal attack aside, we spend trillions on war, but expend much less energy, effort, treasure on building up our own nation. it’s hustle after hustle.

        Free your mind. Trump is not a super hero come to rescue us. When/If the messiah returns, I’m sure many of us will be surprised as to who He will take back with him to Heaven. I’m fairly certain the Masters of War will not be among them, nor will the Epstein class.

        Iran is making more off of oil than they have in years. This oil is denominated in Chinese Yuen. Russia, has also had their sanctions lifted and are making money selling oil. They’ve announced that any oil they sell to Europe will now on be denominated in Chinese Yuen.

        Our bases in the Middle East have been decimated. We’ve lost Billions in aircraft, expended Billions in missile in just a few weeks. We do not even have the industrial capacity to keep up this insanity.

        We funded opposition in Afghanistan, a young freedom fighter named Osama Bin Laden came to prominence. You know the feast of the story.

        Vietnam is a communist nation. They are one of our biggest trading partners.

        The president talks tough about CHINA, but he’s promise to let in hundreds of thousands of Chinese students to take spots from American students in our most prestigious colleges.

        I agree with you Lee. The Democrats are trash. I think our system, the ease it’s which deep pockets can influence it, the foreign influence, the lobbyists, all the blackmail, deep state, It all needs to go.

        We cannot keep waiting for Superman. We cannot bomb our way out of the mess we’ve allowed to happen under our eyes. Israel is not our friend either.

        1. It wasn’t the Democrats that gave rise to Trump, it was the Republicans. Year after year, they came to us and said “vote for me, I’ll stop the Democrats from turning this into a socialist nation.” Then year after year they sat on their hands doing NOTHING while letting the Democrats buy votes with taxpayer dollars. They claimed that they didn’t have enough votes in Congress or they didn’t have the White House and therefore couldn’t do anything. Then when they had all three, they said nothing could be done because of the filibuster. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think they didn’t WANT power, they just wanted to show up every 2 or 6 years and fundraise, then go back to being the backbenchers they were born to be. They’d put up a squish Republican for the nomination and wait for 5 or more conservatives to dilute the base’s vote in the primaries so their designated loser could lose the presidency and they’d be held accountable for nothing. In 2016, the designated loser was supposed to be Jeb!, but Trump put paid to that, sucking all the oxygen out of the room. He’s not Superman, but in essence, he’s the third party that we’ve been waiting for and he did it within the structure of the Republican Party. As much as you hate him, do you think we’d see any progress on illegals, crime or any of the other 80/20 issues we’re seeing progress on now if any other Republican won in 2025?

          Everything makes sense once you figure out that the Democrats would rather be the lords of a third world craphole, than the minority party in a prosperous nation, and the Republicans have no problem with this arrangement as long as they get a piece of the action.

  16. Another attribute of Bizzaro World (just an awesome post here) are those people who think running an insolvent city and state, is infinitely sustainable. In business, if you are consistently insolvent, upside down etc. – I call it a “pretend business”. I think I learned it here, that bankruptcy happens two ways, slowly, then suddenly – might have been Samuel Clemens (who paid all his creditors back BTW).

    Bizzaro world people will say, “look at that skyline” that’s no pretend city. And I would reply, “you’re right, its very real – as real as my demolition and dismantling business. A few people, made a lot of money after the Chicago Fire you know”

    Pretend City, pretend State and the consummate pretend Governor. Govy FF – “FF” for “failing fast”

    A guy who buys his friends, buys his politics. A pretend Governor. Bizarre

  18. Mr. Banakis- I have a one question diagnostic screening test for you-

    Do you think the behavior of this clown we call a president is acceptable?  

    If your answer is affirmative you not only belong in Bizarro World, you are part of the problem, not the solution.  

    Also, I have attended the “No Kings” protests and  can assure you they are filled with very decent, patriotic, and rightfully alarmed citizens. 

    1. Bob, Trump is the ultimate lightening rod. He’s a stooge. The Deep State decided they could not defeat him, so they manage him. He doesn’t have the testicular fortitude to truly fight for the people, nor does he even give a shit about us. He’s all about money, power, prestige, and read the Epstein coverage, but he’s old now and likely needs a crane to get it up.

      Our problem is systemic. It breeds scumbags like this. Democrats are scum too, they’ve looted from us too and they smile while they do it. Look at Obama’s foreign policy, he killed more people, dropped more bombs than even Bush did.

      This my team is better than your team game is an op ran by the deep state and funded by the oligarch. They want to divide us and conquer us. It’s a bust out, a planned bankruptcy. Until your credit runs out, keep borrowing Diamond Jim

  19. The object of the latest No Kings march is to divert the attention of the nation from the shooting of a poor college kid on the lake shore as if demonstration of local ABC news in support of the deranged guy who had been shot himself multiple times and undergone multiple surgeries was not enough!
    -Nambi

  20. Thank you James Banakis.
    It’s true. Obama ripped our once great nation apart. He promised he would. He promised to “fundamentally transform America.” And he did. His lap dogs in the presstocracy and fools like Maitino enabled him.
    But let’s not forget who began this destruction: Jimmy Carter, one of the weakest and most helpless ever to be elected.
    Under Carter, third-world strongmen across the globe rattled their swords.
    He threw Iran to the Islamo-goons.
    We are still paying for Carter’s betrayal.

    1. Yeah. I plead guilty Dave. In 2008 I enthusiastically voted for Mr. Obama. I thought that the election of a black man would be the ultimate “bringing our nation together as one” and the ultimate sign that the ideals expressed in the Declaration and enshrined in our foundational document – the US Constitution – would now – finally – be realized. Hey. What was not to like: an educated black man who spoke the king’s english, better than most. He was articulate. He was an eloquent inspirational orator. Of course I ignored the warning signs. For years he sat in his Church listening to his pastor rant and rave and denigrate the US. And not a peep from him. Of course when this issue came up and threatened his candidacy he did what any cold blooded creepy pol would do: he threw Rev. Wright under the bus. Bye, bye Rev. Yep. Ole Barack was just a power seeking political animal like all the others before him. But as you point out he did what all the others could not do: rather than unite us he did a hell of a job dividing us. I did not repeat my delusional mistake in 2012 though it was too late.

      And Maitino? A fool? Maybe. But he is demonstrably a sanctimonious, “my sh.. don’t smell”, “I know everything” self righteous, gasbagging parasite.

      And Jimmy C? The Left loves him. Such a good man. They repeat that over and over and over regardless of the interminable harm he did as POTUS.

  21. Very well said. I often wonder how and why the f word became mainstream and not vulgar profanity. Sadly, I believe the answer is the degradation of society. The not-my fault, lack of personal responsibility and no discipline generation. Sad.

  23. STILL bemoaning the audacity of a black man who dared think he could be a leader. Curious, during your weekly gathering of the “angry old men” breakfast club, while you and the other rutting stags were mocking fellow Americans for exercising their first amendment rights, did you celebrate our pedophile President for his threat to wipe out an entire civilization, on Easter no less? Nothing says “he has risen” like death threats and expletives. Oh, I don’t know a single Libertarian or Democrat who gives thought one to any of the MAGA media manufactured culture war talk points you seem so consumed by, not one. But the price of gas, caused by a failing war launched to distract from the Epstein files, IS a common topic…

Leave a Reply