Behold The Golden Moutza of the Month
By John Kass
March 5, 2025
In the Middle Ages—a time of plague, knights, Merlins and the burning of witches –in (where else?) Southern France, they had a feast: the Feast of Fools.
The festivals were like Mardi Gras. They dressed up in costumes. They’d dance and act insane, behaving in the most inappropriate sexually licentious manner possible, led by their priests.
Think of the left-wing high priests of today, like CNN’s Jake “ The Fake” Tapper selling books on the Democrat political coverup of Joe Biden’s dementia by Obama 3.0, or the former notorious MSNBC race-baiter Joy Reid weeping when she was fired.
In the ye olden days at the Feast of Fools it was all body humor, farts and so on as used by Ukraine President Volodymyr Zelenskyy, a clown who amused his Russian TV audience by playing “chopsticks” with his penis.
But all good things come to an end. We Americans didn’t need a Feast of Fools when we have the Democrat Party opposing the finding of government waste, fraud and abuse. They’re going cray-cray.
Whole Democrat cities have gone insane, like Worcester, Mass. (transgender sanctuary city) and Chicago, where Mayor Brandon Johnson’s governing shock troops of the CTU protest the arrest and deportation of violent illegal migrants, drug dealers and street gangsters.
But we have something better than the Feast of Fools: The Golden Moutza of the Month. We fight the idiots with the palm of the hand. (no touching!!)
You know how this works. Readers find me on social media and make their nominations. Best nominations contain Nah! or other magic words.
Wisconsin governor (d) Tony Evers is backing legislation to replace “woman” with “inseminated person”. This guy lapped our Jelly Belly in the stupid derby. Nah, and another nah. Michael J. Maggio
Moutza to the Chicago City Council for voting in favor of this bond issue loan. Interest only payments will be paid longer than I will live. Nah! Feesah Etho! Brandon Johnson, NAH! Just for being BLM Brandon! NAH NAH NAH!Christine Morley
That idiot from Sabina Mike Burke
That “idiot” is the renegade leftist Catholic priest Michael Pfleger, pastor of the alleged Catholic church St. Sabina. He is impervious to his bishop’s control (because the bishop is also a lefty) and made “news” by illegally flying the American flag upside down to protest the Republicans. If only Pfleger had lived in Medieval Southern France, he may have been elected pope by the other fools, or burned.
Nah!
In the immortal words of Kirk Douglas as the deadly but lovelorn Einar the Viking, “take your magic elsewhere holy man.”
One thing history tells us is that Greeks are inveterate gamblers. But now apparently Greeks are not allowed to invest in Chicago’s casino, because of Democrat racial politics and DEI, Another reader addresses the issue here:
Moutza to the “Casino of Color”, built upon the former Tribune Freedom Center when men & women of every race toiled late into the night to print newspapers that exposed City Hall hypocrisy. For example, the Trib published reports of arrogant Mayor Daly Jr degrading a young lady as a “Dago”, as reported by journalism legend John Kass. Under diversity rules, Irish, Italian and Greek investors are banned from Brandon’s bonanza. Nah ! No Greeks allowed in the new casino boardroom, even though they were rejected as “non-white” just 2 generations ago. Same with dagos like my Grampa Gilberto from Abruzzo, Italy LOL . Nah ! Moutza!! Tom Winike
Greeks became white the moment Onassis married American princess Jacqueline Kennedy. I ‘m a Greek who doesn’t gamble, strange, like an Irishman who won’t have good whiskey on St. Patrick’s Day. Now I can’t wait for Obama’s ambitious Chicago mayoral hopeful Alexi “Polekatz” Giannoulias to grab hold of this one. God save us from politically ambitious Greeks bearing gifts.
Governor Commodius Maximus for his “balanced budget” and his Nazi speech to position his largess for the future run for President Alfi Susan
Pritzker pays for Democrat stupidity in Illinois. He demands allegiance on his transgender policy that demands minor children be castrated through “gender affirming care” to salve his barbaric politics. If there was a real Republican Party in Illinois, Pritzker’s Democrats would be toast.
I nominate Governor Toilets, aka Gov Fat Boy the aforementioned JB Pritzker for trying to turn attention away from his failed attempt at being a Governor by trotting out the old “Nazi Routine” to rouse his rabble. NAH! Blow on it Fat Boy! said, Bill Isaacson
I hope I’m not too late, but it has to go to Tony Evers, the Governor of Wisconsin for trying to change the word “mother” to “inseminated person”…the lunatic left knows no bounds! said, Diane Puetz
You should have the golden Malaka of the year just for Pfleger said George GN.
Come on George, he’s a priest during lent dammit!!!
This goes out to the reader on FB that criticized me for offering Gov. Pritzker “ONE MORE MINT” NAH! said, Ron Zielke.
Pfleger and throw in the Cardinal for not stopping this immediately said, Marilyn Hill.
Maybe we should give one to Father Photo Op if for no other reason than he’s probably having a personal crisis from the lack of TV cameras in front of him lately and needs the attention. Nah! said, David Kleckner.
Luigi Mangione.
I simply can’t believe that people support this murderer. He took the life of an innocent man thinking he was making a statement about the health insurance industry.He’s raising funds and people who support him are concerned that he may face the death penalty. How hypocritical that they suddenly care about life, after he murdered someone. He’s a coward and a jerk. Nah! said, Chuck MacDonald.
It’s a target rich environment. I Need some time to narrow it down. But we have no time!! We have no time!!
Consider: Our national debt is so large that the interest payments on the loan costs us $1 trillion a year —more than we spend on our military and yet Democrats are screaming that Trump cutting waste is unfair and mean as we sail off the edge of the world to our nation’s doom. I’m thinking we give ourselves the Golden Moutza of the Month.
Yet in November some 77 million Americans voted for common sense and liberty.
But I don’t think Jake the Fake Tapper voted for Trump, after spending so much time lying about him. And racist Joy Reid didn’t, though she had her blonde hair going just before the axe fell. And I thought she was black! And Jake was a journalist, though he became nothing but a left-wing Obama lickspittle. The international clown Zelensky the Fool can’t save Reid and Tapper. He’s bringing the world closer to nuclear war. There’s nothing amusing about WWIII. When the world blows up think of him entertaining his audience by playing Chopin with his special purpose.
And Jake? Joy? Can you hear me through the bricks of your brains?
Jake and Joy you ‘re neo-Marxists and you hate America like all the commies before you, and all the ones who’ll come after. You hate our liberty and freedom. You hate our common sense. That’s why you say so many stupid things.
But we’re not your chumbolones. Anyone who buys your books or listens to your shows are nincompoops and want to be treated as fools. So lift up your faces and smirk like the idiot in the image below and come get your Golden Moutza of the Month.
Nah!
Feesah etho! Parta!! Take them Blow on it.
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About the author: John Kass spent decades as a political writer and news columnist in Chicago working at a major metropolitan newspaper. He is co-host of The Chicago Way podcast. And he just loves his “No Chumbolone” hat, because johnkassnews.com is a “No Chumbolone” Zone where you can always get a cup of common sense.
Merchandise Now Available: If you’re looking for a gift for that hard-to-buy for special someone who has everything, just click on the link to the johnkassnews.com store.
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Comments 20
Good choice from a crowded field of fools.
Is there no journalism code of ethics? Why are the liars and propagandists allowed to continue spreading manure so often without consequence. As if they are training for their next career as politicians or used car salesmen of old.
They’re feeling the consequences as their employers either fire them or are dying slowly because they keep them on.
That was some Feast of All Fools!
The Blond Jesus of 79th Street is a perennial favorite, as is Governor Zeppelin!
Cardinal and ArchLouse Cupich as well! I am all a tingle and can’t wait to draw ashes today in memorial of my manifold follies.
But I got nothing on these clowns! Happy Lent!
Governor Zeppelin! Excellent, Pat.
Tapper and Joy are very worthy choices, but who pays any attention to them anyway? Governor Money Bags bleats about free health care (and other free goodies) for the illegals, while the rest of us pay property taxes, gasoline taxes, (did you notice the gasoline tax went up in January because of inflation caused by Democrats?) sale taxes, income taxes, etc., through the nose and pay for our own health insurance on top of it. And the idiot still can’t balance a budget? But he has plenty of time to look for Nazis under every bush. Let’s turn Elon Musk loose in Illinois. That should be really educational.
Good call. Your masthead Moutza graphic should have been submitted for our new Illinois state flag art consideration. Flown upside down until the regime is finally booted.
Good suggestion on the Illinois Flag!
Flown upside down, the Golden Moutza would look like a hand out begging for a bribe.
Pretty fitting for Illinois, I’d say.
No doubt Jake the Snake (no disrespect to former Cincinnati QB Jake Plummer) is a deserving choice. But any acknowledgement he or Joy Reid get, even in negative terms, is not good. They thrive on attention and need to be totally ignored and discounted. Unfortunately too many fools will buy the book or look for ways to showcase Reid.
The list gets longer and longer every month, that should worry everyone.
The Moutza “award plaque” needs a logo, a poster child. This could be someone or something that would be worthy each and every month. I suggest the ideal poster child be Gov CM. Maybe the Cancer of Chicago and Cook County, Toni Preckwinkle. Unfortunately, her head and overinflated ego would match JB’s midsection. In either case that would mean an award the size of a billboard, and who would want to constantly see either mug on something small lest something oversized.
So many candidates! John it’s getting difficult, you really need to order dozens of Golden Moutzas to award each month.
Jeez, John you are truly a man of steel for being able to sort through all of the much deserving Moutza- worthy applicants. My head would explode from the massive weight of trying to narrow down the list! All are deserving, there are no bad selections. Truly a list where everyone gets a trophy. Notorious Windbagger Flather Fleger does deserve an extra special Moutza for the flag stunt though. As the temperatures climb in Chicago and his “parishioners ” clean out their guns for the annual St. Sabina Festival of (Gunfire) Lights and the Southside spring/summer bloodbath begins he will surely right the American flag. He only flies the distress flag for an ” abnormal ” crisis, like a Republican presidency. The shooting /maiming/deaths of mostly black kids does not qualify . This is normalcy ya see? Fleger knows a real crisis when sees one. Just remember the Rule of Chicago
when you hear gunfire. DUCK.
Excellent suggestions by all. Must have been tough to go with just one, John. Great column and descriptions of the worthy candidates.
Not sure where to start here. Definitely Mayor Brandon. I didn’t know Chicago was so welcoming a city that it actually has a Welcoming Ordinance that apparently only applies to non-residents. Also, Mayor B, said that all the “illegals” were sent here by Texas. Maybe he thought they didn’t know about the Welcoming Ordinance. Nah!
Another worthy Moutza, Mr. Kass. I’ve been enjoying the connection you’ve made lately between raving neo-Marxists and blithering fools.
Not every fool is a Marxist, but every Marxist is a fool. And while their “progressive” coalition is broad, it’s too narrow to sustain adequate income for all those declining Jakes, Joys, and other journalistic jokes. Meanwhile, I’ll bet JKN subscriptions keep increasing.
My nominee for best nomination of the month, by a wafer-thin margin, goes to Ron Zielke for the Monty Python/Mr. Creosote “ONE MORE MINT” reference.
John: I am really sorry to be saying this. To quote from Hamlet, “the lady doth protest too much”. You are now sounding like the bleating idiots of the Chi Trib. I get that you wronged. Why can’t you get over it.? On Zelensky. Same question. Imagine if your grandfather had folded rather than fought the Nazi. You have folded.
I agree with you regarding Zelensky. Somehow in John’s world Zelensky is the aggressor and not the victim. It’s truly mind boggling.
Who else but our mayor BJ with an incredible 6,6% approval rating. Just wondering….Who are those 6% ?
Indeed, February offered many suitable candidates. After Pres. Trump’s address to Congress, the March field for the Golden Moutza may be even more crowded. Just when you start thinking the Democrats can’t become more deranged and irrelevant, they do.
I would have nominated Al Green, the Texas nutjob who is no doubt proud of being forcibly evicted from the House floor for screaming at Trump. Hey Al, fessah etho, parta, nah xathese.